Italian Police recently confiscated a gun disguised as a cellphone. Ok, so you’re a hardcore bad ass assassin, but too much of a wuss for a real weapon, so you get Zach Morris (from Saved by the Bell) to sell you his huge 1980’s monstrosity of a phone, beat him to death with it, then turn it into something with stealthy stopping power. Your target would have to either be blind or mentally handicapped but it you get 4 shots.

It holds 4 bullets and goes on sale at your local Chinese black market this fall.